Poppy Desclouds, our Manager of Research and Standards

The person behind the performance: How pressure shapes us

Poppy DesClouds has been performing for as long as she can remember. She started ballet at two-and-a-half and began playing violin at three. Performance was a core part of her childhood.

But like many people who grow up performing, she eventually noticed a gap.

People could be deeply committed to what they loved and still hit a wall. Sometimes there’s a shift where something that once felt joyful suddenly feels heavy, frightening or out of reach.

“It didn’t matter if it was a skier, a dancer or a surgeon,” she says. “What mattered was understanding the person behind the performance."

That realization drew her to working in mental performance.

Today, Poppy is the Manager of Research and Standards at The Knowledge Institute. She also works as a Certified Mental Performance Consultant®, supporting athletes in high-performance sport. But her lens expands beyond sport. It’s about people: how pressure can sharpen us, derail us, disconnect us from what matters — and what it takes to support someone through it.

We sat down with Poppy to talk about how pressure really works, why it often goes unnoticed and what high-performance environments can teach all of us.

Mental toughness gets thrown around a lot, especially in sport. What does it mean and where might we get it wrong?

When people say “mental toughness,” they usually mean showing up in the face of adversity and still performing. Where we get it wrong is assuming that toughness means pushing through quickly, no matter the cost and without emotion.

Toughness has become associated with stoicism — acting unaffected. But resilience doesn’t work that way. Working through something can take time. It is dynamic and can involve experiencing a full range of emotions. Sometimes pushing through isn’t even the safest or best option.

We really revere toughness, but we don’t always talk about what might be hiding underneath.

Resilience is about knowing your comforts, your challenges and your limits — and recognizing when each has a place. It isn’t about feeling nothing. It’s about learning and practicing to embrace challenge, stay attuned to your experience of it and make informed choices about how to respond.

When people are working in high-pressure environments, what do you notice most about how pressure shows up?

Pressure often isn’t acknowledged until it’s causing problems.

Pressure can actually be helpful. It can sharpen focus. It can push growth. But we don’t tend to recognize that part. We only start talking about pressure when it stops serving us. When it starts to feel overwhelming instead of motivating.

When pressure isn’t well supported, it can overtake passion and self-awareness. People lose connection to what they’re doing and why they’re doing it and that’s often when the negative impacts of pressure begin to show up. Not just because the work is hard, but because the meaning gets lost.

How can we balance pushing people to do their best while also protecting their mental health and wellbeing?

You can't push without supporting.

Rest and recovery aren’t optional; they’re part of the performance program. When pressure increases, recovery is usually the first thing people cut. But without recovery, performance eventually falls apart.

There’s a principle I come back to: high challenge must be matched with high support. It’s a combination that builds real resilience. Challenge must increase thoughtfully and incrementally alongside skill building. Otherwise, it’s like throwing someone into the ocean and telling them to learn to swim.

High challenge with low support can lead to stress and burnout. High support with low challenge can limit growth.

Support has to grow as pressure grows. Without it, pressure doesn’t build strength, it builds strain. Meaning matters too. When someone understands their “why,” performing under pressure feels different. It becomes more sustainable.

What have you learned from working with high-performance individuals that you could take back to your work in child and youth mental health and addictions?

Nothing sits in isolation.

When you talk to someone about performance, you’re also talking about home life, school, relationships and all the factors that shape how they show up.

High performers don’t exist in a vacuum. Their environment matters. Their supports matter. Their stressors matter. Every part of their life influences how they perform.

Young people are no different.

They don’t experience their lives in silos. What happens at school impacts home and what happens at home shapes how they show up in care.

That whole-person lens is essential. If we only focus on one piece, we miss what’s really going on.

As a parent, do you notice your work showing up with your kids at home?

Yes, but maybe not in the way people expect.

People often ask what sports I won’t let my kids play. For me, it’s less about the activity and more about the skills.

I want to model regulation, finding support, naming feelings, working through them and facing challenges with curiosity. Those skills matter more to me than the specific pursuit.

In sport especially, what keeps kids engaged isn’t intensity, it’s support. When young people feel safe exploring, making mistakes and opening up without being judged, they’re more likely to stay connected to what they love.

Has working in this environment changed how you think about your own performance or limits?

It’s made me more aware of how I respond to pressure.

It’s always easier to teach a skill than to practice it. There are moments where I catch myself thinking, “You just told someone rest is important, maybe you should listen to that too.”

Over time, my relationship with pressure has changed. I used to only notice it when it felt overwhelming. Now I can be more welcoming of it. I can remind myself that I have support and that I can always try again.

And none of this happens overnight. Change takes time.